The Little Things

I really wish I went to Trojan Olympics this year, especially since being a part of the team freshman year was one of the best experiences. I hate when I have to choose between academics and fun... but these days, every choice I make will affect where I go in life. All this talk about college acceptances and rejections for the class of 2010 is even stressing me out. I will admit that I am pretty jealous of certain seniors who worked their ass off and receive beautiful acceptance letters. And also of visiting college freshmen who rub their wonderful college experiences in our innocent faces (*ahem.. An, Vivian, and Ivy haha<3). My fate awaits me in one year.

There are times in life when I feel lonely. I've come to realize there's different kinds of loneliness: there's the kind when you're constantly surrounded by people that love you but you can't really relate to, the kind where you know you have great people to talk to but find it hard to connect or relate to, the kind where you're right next to those people but still feel a certain kind of emptiness, the kind where you want to talk to certain people but are scared to approach them, the kind where you feel like you are completely isolated from the world, and the kind where it's just you and your own little thoughts. I think I manage to go through a cycle of all of these variations from time to time. And I guess the best way to solve these problems is just to snap out of it and do something productive.

I'd like to say that guys, in general, fail at taking initiative. And then there are those that don't understand when we are totally not interested in them. I see many, TOO many, cases where these little boys wimp out at the chance of being men, or think they are men when they are actually far from it, and it's rather disheartening. And also, girls (most girls) are NOT dumb. Yes, we get your hints. And yes, we do drop hints. We are, in fact, very aware of how we present ourselves and how you guys present yourselves. And believe it or not, we do have a general idea of how you feel towards us. Am I right ladies?

And I would like to give a shoutout to my hoodlum friends (the ladies with the initials ABCCCMVV) who dress like hoodlums, walk like hoodlums, and ditch class like hoodlums teehee ;) CAN YOU BELIEVE THAT WE ALL ARE GOING TO PROM?! And with dates too! Hella cla$sy/bo$s or what? You ladies are my gangster BAMFs and I love love love you!

*Happy birthday Courtney Caglia-Hilty!

The Basics

So I told my parents about prom, and... wait for it... they are supportive about it! BIG SURPRISE RIGHT? I thought they would give me crap about it but my mom was just like "Okay, let's go get a dress! You know, you have to go to your high school prom. I feel like if I didn't let you, you would have some kind of psychological wound and that's not good!" and my dad's just like "Is your date taller than me??" hahaha silly dad. I feel like I've come so far as a daughter. I've never had a full-blown rebellious stage; only arguments here and there (although some were quite dramatic). Even still, the disagreements are extremely rare nowadays. I think the last time I've argued with my parents was around a year ago? There isn't much of a reason to anymore. They trust me to do what I gotta do with my priorities and I respect them and listen. As always, I am extremely thankful for my family and I love love love them.

The more I think about it, the more I realize that I would live a sad, sad life without swimming. I think I would be reduced to a bare minimum without it. Swimming can be the solution to most problems. Stressed? Swim your head off and your mind is cleared. Sick? Swim a few laps and no more runny nose, haha. Fat? Ate too much again? Swim that weight off! Depressed? Go to MHS swim practice with some of the coolest people ever<3 I don't believe I would be who I am today without my team and a pool nearby.

When I have reached a certain age of maturity (which basically means when I get a real job), I am going to blow my first paycheck on high-heels and then wear a pair every time I leave my apartment/house/dorm. I have no clue why I am so in love with them, but I am! Especially stilettos and booties. This is probably surprising since I wear boring shoes all the time. Heels, however, are gorgeous and they make me feel very happy. Clothes are ehhh to me, unless it's a beautiful dress, but shoes are the best part of an outfit.

It's really difficult to consume a healthy diet, especially with a license, a car, and some freetime after swimming practice. My new rules are to stay away from rice at dinner, drink water only, eat breakfast so I don't feel hungry all day, and remind myself that I must stay in shape for swimming (and now prom) whenever I am ordering at a restaurant. It's especially hard right now as I type, since I am really craving some Ghirardelli chocolate... be right back! :D

Who's excited for prom? ME! :)

Empire State of Mind

It's a good thing to be passionate. About a hobby, a person, a cause. Sure, it can be disappointing when you do not do as well as you had hoped, but it can be all the more exciting when you DO.

I absolutely adore our Science Olympiad members. I think they deserve all the best things in the world. I've laughed the hardest today since... months, to the point where my voice is eight octaves higher, my sides hurt, and tears are streaming down my cheeks. Today was the best, and I thank you all who made it what it was.

I AM SO BLISSFUL RIGHT NOW! Just got back from eating until we became pregnant, racing down and leaping along the sidewalk, and dancing in the street. It's so simple, but it means everything.

Try and knock me down.